


The Aggreived

by Glyphron



Category: Star Wars Legends: Knights of the Old Republic
Genre: Angst and Feels, Drama & Romance, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-19
Updated: 2015-12-19
Packaged: 2018-05-07 14:42:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5460161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glyphron/pseuds/Glyphron
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the depths of Revan's feelings, regret and love can both be found.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In The Depths

**Author's Note:**

> This is actually the very first piece of fanfiction I ever wrote.

*deep beneath the seas of Manaan, in the research facility on the Racart Rift...*

 

Revan, Carth, and Jolee crept cautiously down the hall in silence. All three were tense and strained their ears to catch any sound. However, they could hear nothing, save the slight groaning of the facility being pressed down upon by sea water; and an occasional dripping sound where the ceiling leaked. Otherwise, an eerie silence engulfed them.

Revan shivered as she recalled the crazed twi'lek they'd met, just before entering the station. His eyes had been wide and bloodshot, his pupils, dilated. His face had been twisted into an immense expression of fear and hysteria. He'd fitfully explained how the selkath had gone insane, turning on their allies and devouring their flesh while their victims still lived. He'd laughed cynically at them when they decided to enter the premises anyway. 

"If you want to go, then go," he'd sneered "But you'll end up a meal, just like every body else."

She could imagine the shocking scene that had taken place when the selkath fell to insanity. The images twisted her stomach and made her consciousness reel. They hadn't come across any selkath yet, but they had come across a few mangled corpses with bites torn from their necks and limbs. Their mutilation and smell of decay had nearly caused her to vomit. She'd adapted to the horror of it all, enough not to gag, but it still made her sick.

Revan shuddered again, for a different reason this time. She trembled, even quaked, beneath the hot and abhorrent glare of Carth's dark eyes upon her back. She'd unfortunately caught his attention with her first quiver. Now, she wished he would look away, even though she knew she deserved the misery it brought her.

At a different place, in a different time, they'd been friends once. They had trusted each other. But, that had been when she was just a talented woman named Luminessa. Now that they both knew who she really was, it had all fallen apart.

Revan wondered if Carth knew how much pain his eyes inflicted, or if he even cared.

She might have prefered to have left him on board the Ebon Hawk, or, at least in Ahto city on the surface. However, he had insisted on coming so that he could keep an eye on her. She no longer possesed the strength to speak to him, let alone refuse. So Revan had said nothing and hadn't prevented Carth from following, a decision with a price.

She supposed she should be grateful. She couldn't say what, but she knew something had happened to Carth recently. Whatever it might have been, it had made his stares less intense. Revan realized she should be ashamed, as well. She deserved never ending pain and torment. It was wrong of her to be thankful that she was receiving less than she should.

Still, Revan was correct in her assumption that something had happened to her spiteful, Republic pilot. Only, it had been more than one event.

The first occurrence that had taken place, was a visitation from the spirit of his wife, Morganna. She'd come on the night after the revelation of Luminessa's true identity. Moganna had come to explain to him that Revan was not the enemy that he thought she was. She told him that he needed to forgive and let go. She said that it hadn't been Revan's fault that she had died, that there were circumstances he wasn't aware of. She told him many things. Things that didn't make sense, but she promised him they would in the near future. Then, she had told him something he'd never forget.

"I was surprised at first."

"What are you talking about?" 

"The galaxy's greatest threat, is also it's only hope."

She had left him then. She had left him to cry in agony until he had no more tears to cry. He'd then forced himself to get a grip, anger and pain surging through his blood. He'd left the cockpit and made his way towards the women's dorm, unsure of what he intended to do once there. On his way, he heard Jolee talking to Juhani and paused.

"I'm surprised myself." He heard Jolee say.

Carth couldn't help but continue to listen in.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I'm simply amazed to see what Revan is really like."

"I still don't understand what you mean."

"Let me explain. Revan has no real memory of her former self. Therefore, her former identity has had no way of influencing her behavior. That means she has had to act on pure instinct. In other words, we've seen who she really is deep down inside. All the words she's said and the actions she's committed up until now, are displays of her true nature. It is amazing just how noble she really is."

"I think I understand what you're saying. You mustn't forget, she was a hero, one of the greatest, before she was a villain. And she was just as great a jedi as she had ever been a sith."

"You speak truth, of course. Sadly, even she does not realize this. I fear for her..."

It was at that point that Carth had moved on, his mind jumbled and confused. He wasn't sure what to think. However, he couldn't let that deter him. Moments later he'd entered the women's dorm. Revan was lying upon the floor with her back to him. Apparently, she'd fallen asleep while meditating.

He just stood and simply stared, still confused as ever. He'd remained staring for what had felt like an eternity. Then slowly, quietly, he removed his blastor pistol from its holster. He'd held it up and looked at it. He was half tempted to put it up against his head and squeeze the trigger. Yet, he'd turned it on her instead. He'd slightly trembled as he pointed the weapon at the back of her left shoulder. His finger had put pressure on the trigger, but did not pull it.

Again, he'd remained like that for what seemed forever, trying to organize his thoughts and stop the torrent of confusion. Finally, feeling too exhausted, too unsure, he lowered the pistol and replaced it in its holster. He'd been watching her that whole time. She had made little fuss in her sleep, which had seemed unusual considering she almost never slept peacefully. He'd turned to walk away and return to the pilots seat where he could rest his mind and then figure things out. 

He had been stopped suddenly when he heard Revan whimper his name. He'd turned to face her, assuming that she'd woken and seen him. Carth had been taken aback when he'd found she was still sleeping. She'd writhed and whimpered again, calling out for Bastila. At that point she had rolled onto her back and Carth had seen tears streaming from her eyes.

What in the force is she dreaming about? 

He'd thought, watching as she had continued to struggle. Moments later she'd gone still. She'd whimpered twice more, and then had fallen silent. He'd left her there.  
It was the night after, that the nightmares had begun. There were three of them.

In one, Revan would come to him as he sat in the pilot's chair. She would attempt to beg forgiveness. He'd lose his temper and threaten her. When she would continue to plead with him, he'd violently shove her against the wall and let her sink in the corner. Then he would grab his pistol and point it between her eyes. She'd flash a sad, understanding smile and a tear would slip down her cheek. Then her eyes would close and his finger would begin to squeeze the trigger.

In another, she would come to find him in the galley. She'd always look terrible as though she'd ceased to eat, drink or sleep. She would quote his desire for revenge on her and Malak, then try to persuade him to take her life. He would refuse and tell her to do it herself. She would explain that she'd tried, then tempt him again. When he would continue to refuse, she'd leave. Moments later he'd hear a blastor shot and go running. He'd find her in the cargo hold, face up, eyes empty, and mind bleeding.

In the third, he would watch as she defended him and the others with her life; fighting to stop Malak from destroying everything. The Dark Lord would bellow out her crimes one by one, wearing her down. Eventually she would no longer be able to withstand him, becoming too weak to fight. She'd stumble and Malak would spear her through the middle.

At the end of every dream he would recall the promise he'd made to protect her, and how eager he'd been to make and keep it. He would then recall how quick he was to revoke that vow. However, the worst aspect about them, was that he always ended up feeling nearly the same as he had when he'd watched his wife die.

The final considerable event, was that they'd gone back to Dantooine. She'd walked its ruins alone and returned smelling of smoke and despair. From that point on she was different.

Revan didn't speak any unnecessary words to anyone; she barely ever ate or drank anything; she nearly ceased to sleep altogether; and she began to avoid everyone. To add to that, her features became emotionless. Carth couldn't tell if she'd died inside, and therefore ceased to feel anything; or if her emotions were such a violent storm she was unable to express them. Even her actions expressed nothing. She breathed, fought, and moved as though she were utterly numb. On rare occasions she would glance his way as though she wished to speak, or shiver as though some painful memory had stabbed itself into her mind.

Carth sighed and took his eyes off of Revan's back. He had slightly hoped that she would look his way with that desirous expression, but she had not. Truth be told, he felt sympathy for her. Even though he tried with all his might not to. He hated to admit it, but seeing her like this made him sad.

He'd started falling in love with Luminessa, and though he now knew that she was really Revan, those feelings were hard to completely destroy. He knew he had to find a way to kill them, however. She would get no mercy from him. Revan had caused the destruction of Telos. If she hadn't fallen to the dark side, Malak wouldn't have either.

He had thought that she would've been stronger. More capable of withstanding the pain. She had been so strong before. Now she was slowly breaking, and he knew it. He knew she deserved to suffer, or did she?

Is what Morganna told me true? Is she really not to blame? Are there circumstances that I actually don't know about? He thought.

He supposed he'd never know. Even Revan couldn't know for sure. She'd lost all her memories.

Carth couldn't help wondering who she really was and if she was really so terrible. He decided he should stop thinking about it all for the time being. There was just too much going on, and too much confusion. Besides, he'd been pondering for so long that his mind was exhausted. He let his mind go blank and tried to ignore the nagging of those thoughts as they tugged at his consciousness; begging for him to continue to think on them.


	2. Perspective

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jolee wishes he could offer Revan more aid. She has more than proven her mettle.

When Carth's eyes left Revan's back, Jolee gave an inward sigh of relief. He'd been waiting, poised to intervene if Carth tried something. Carth might be quick to condemn her, but he wasn't.

He knew Revan was suffering and it made his heart throb. She was such a kind and caring lass. He wished he could help her. Not only was one of her best friends against her, but another was imprisoned by Malak. Also,she'd found out that she was the galaxy's former worst enemy. But what had done her under, was the walk on Dantooine's scarred surface. If only Carth had been there. Then maybe he would've realized that she wasn't so different from him.

They'd landed on Dantooine in the early morning. The ship's scanners had picked up no traces of life left within or upon the grounds of the jedi enclave. Still, Revan had set off at once. She couldn't be convinced. 

She had wandered the ruins alone for hours. In fact, it began to get dark before Jolee decided to go search for her. He had slipped out unnoticed and wandered the ruins aimlessly. Finally, he'd found her, braced up against what remained of the enclave's front door, and singing quietly.

He'd approached and seated himself next to her. Then, looking over at her, he'd noticed six empty whisky bottles at her side, and a seventh, half empty one in her hand. She stopped singing and gave a snort of laughter to the sky.

"I was remembering something that happened here. It's the only memory I have of this place before the wars. It's happy. And it's the only thing keeping me from complete despair."

As she'd uttered the last few words, tears had begun to fall.

"I know, lass. The pain is difficult to bear."

"I'm so pathetic. I've downed six and a half bottles of whisky and I still haven't found relief. I don't even feel buzzed. Damned jedi training. I thought if I could just drink enough, it would overpower my resistance to toxins. But, no, it's like I'm drinking water."

"Peh! I know what you mean. Irritating isn't it? But I suppose it's for the best. If you were to succeed in drowning your troubles, you'd probably lose your rational mind as well."

"It's not only that...They sent me to save the galaxy, but I can't even find a way to open the door to the sub-basement!"

He'd taken a moment to think.

"They sent you because, even if you cannot open a simple door at the moment, they knew that you'd eventually regain enough power to stop the darkness and destruction. They were afraid of you. But they also believed in you. I don't think they were wrong to believe."

"I couldn't save them, Jolee! I couldn't save them. The galaxy needed them, and I failed to preserve that need. Now they're all dead. The masters, the apprentices, the padawans...Men, women, and children! All burned to death. We didn't even sense the catastrophe of such a great magnitude! What a powerful jedi I am..."

She'd thrown the seventh bottle of whisky with her last statement, and Jolee had watched it shatter into a million, glittering shards. He'd then sighed.

"You're being too hard on yourself, lass. Even if you'd sensed it, what could you have done? All that would've happened is more pain and suffering. The potency of that feeling would have probably killed us. Well, maybe not you, but it would have dealt you an injury that might never have healed."

"I suppose. Still, I should have known. Why didn't we feel it?"

"They probably used the last of their strength to shield the galaxy from it."

Revan had then gathered her knees and cried into them. Her sobs had been those of a broken heart. She'd trembled as she'd cried. Releasing all the agony she'd bottled up inside had kept her from going mad. However, it hadn't eased the pain.

After a while her sobs had subsided. Jolee had still been there, rubbing her back reassuringly.

"Let it go, Revan, let it go. They would not have wanted you to suffer over them. And they're still counting on you, they still believe. They know you will not let their deaths be in vain. It isn't over..."

At his whispering she'd looked up, tears still welled up in her eyes. She'd then embraced him, as a niece might hug an uncle. It had been a quick gesture, but it was one of friendship. When she'd let go of him, he had persuaded her to come back with him.

"No. Not yet. I need a little more time. Just a little."

He'd nodded, and left her there to let her have the time she'd requested. He'd still been worried, but he'd known she wouldn't fall apart just yet.

She'd spent the entire night roaming those ruins. Then, she had returned that morning, changed. Those changes were steadily making Jolee more and more worried as time passed. Yet, there wasn't much he could do for the time being. So he focused more on the task at hand.


	3. Falling Down My Fair Lady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is a price to pay for neglect.

The trio continued at a slow pace, Revan still leading in her odd gait. She was relieved to be released from Carth's eyes; even if it was wrong of her to be. She had little time to relax, however. Seconds later, they came upon their first door. 

Revan paused to listen. She could hear groaning sounds emitting from the room ahead, but they were not the same as those made by the station under pressure. Extending her jedi senses only confirmed her anxiety. The chamber harbored a large group of selkath. 

She drew her weapons without a word. Knowing that the other two would do likewise. The door slid open to expose the nearly zombified creatures to the eyes of the three. The beasts had been taken by surprise. One of the crazed selkath fired a repulser at Revan. She raised her two single hilt blades and formed a cross before her, blocking the weapon's discharge.

She then lowered her light sabers to a defensive position, waiting to see their reaction. They began to move toward her small group, gaining speed as they came. Revan took more of an offensive position, the silver blue light of her blades reflecting off of the selkaths' slime coated skin. The jedi swords hummed comfortingly in her hands.

The first two selkath to meet her sabers had their throats cut in one sweeping slash. She could hear blastor shots behind her as Carth began blasting the beasts between the eyes. She could also hear the hum and strikes of a second pair of light sabers as Jolee struck the oncoming foes between the shoulders. It didn't take long to clear the room, but Revan guessed there were larger groups of selkath, waiting in the chambers ahead.

Before moving on, the trio searched all the remains, footlockers, and storage bins for any supplies they could use. Afterward, Jolee went around examining some of the selkath bodies.

"Hmmmm," he mused "There's no sign of trauma, or head injury."

He then took some blood samples and tested them in a small kit he carried.

"There's no toxins in their blood either. Strange, there isn't any reason they should be behaving this way. Still, not everything can be explained."

Up until that point, he'd been talking to himself as much as anyone. Now, however, he looked up to make sure the other two were paying attention.

"You two be careful. The chemical make up of their saliva can be toxic to humans. I know how you young un's tend to be reckless. But this isn't the place to try anything foolish."

Jolee repacked his equipment, Carth and Revan remaining silent as he did so. Then the three of them proceeded to the next door, Revan still in the lead. They were cautious as ever.

The next three rooms were relatively the same as the first. Each time they were greeted with repulsor discharges and vicious assaults. Each time they had cleared the room quite quickly and searched for usable supplies. The fifth chamber they entered was different.

There were six or seven more selkath in the group. To make matters worse, most of them carried a weapon of some sort. Also, their assaults were more calculated. Aside from being overcrowded, the chamber was smaller than those previous. This caused more restrictions to movement. 

The struggle began, the selkath being well aware of their advantage. Even with limited space to move in, Revan held her ground easily. Still, it hadn't been her safety for which she'd been concerned. The lives of her companions were her main focus.

Of all three of them, she had always been the strongest. She was young, fit, cunning, held a powerful command of the force, etc. However, the other two had more weak points than she did.

Jolee was full of age. Though he'd been living in the shadow-lands of Kashyyk, until recently, which had kept him strong, he did not posses quite as much energy or maneuverability that she and Carth had. That, and his senses were not as keen as they used to be.

On the other hand, Carth was younger and reckless when angry. Since the day they'd discovered her true identity, anger had been consistently surging through him. To add to that, he wasn't very good at hand to hand combat. The selkath weren't standing back and returning fire from a distance, they were lunging at their targets. Thus exploiting Carth's weakness.

Revan's fears became reality. A subdivided group of five selkath concentrated their efforts on Carth. Being preoccupied with her own attackers, and being slightly weak due to fatigue caused by self neglect; she didn't notice his peril until he cried out as one of them bit into his shoulder.

She threw a look in his direction. The group had knocked Carth's blastor from his hand and tackled him to the floor. There, four were pinning him down while the fifth tore into him.

Forgetting her own engagements, she did a double back flip, bringing herself right beside the five and their captive. Upon landing, she swung her blades in a wide strike. A move that swiftly beheaded all five selkath at once. She then continued to fight the others while defending him from further danger.

Carth lay there, gaping, for a moment. Not only was he in pain, but Revan had just saved his life again. Furthermore, she was now protecting him from further harm. He glanced at his shoulder. It stung bitterly, and blood seeped from the curved row of small punctures. He heaved himself to his feet and retrieved his blastor. By that time Revan had ended the battle by slaying the last remaining foe.

Carth stole a glimpse at her. She stood, frozen, with her battle ready sabers at her sides. She seemed to be reflecting on what had just taken place. He turned his attention to Jolee. The elderly man was trying to catch his breath. Carth wondered if Jolee would be able to take much more of this.

He nearly started when Revan suddenly appeared behind him. Both he and Jolee turned to face her. She made no eye contact with either of them. Instead she stared, blankly, ahead.

"Carth's hurt..." She muttered softly.

He wondered if she wanted to say more; if she wanted to ask him if he was alright like she had always done before. 

Truth be told, she very much desired to do so. Yet, she held it back, figuring that it wouldn't matter. Instead, she searched the room for supplies while Jolee inspected Carth's wound. 

"What did I tell you about being careful?" Jolee scolded.

Carth sighed, but said nothing. He wasn't feeling well.

"Your injury is contaminated," he continued "But don't panic. I have here an antidote pack that'll take care of it. But, it is my last one. So let this be a lesson to you, and avoid getting bitten in the future."

Carth didn't reply. He'd been watching Revan the whole time. He could've sworn he saw her freeze and grimace for a brief second when Jolee had said his wound was contaminated. His attention returned to Jolee when he felt the sting of the antidote injection.

"There now," Jolee nodded "You'll be fine."

The three of them moved through several more rooms. All the while, Revan worked harder to provide protection for the other two from the crazed selkath. She had been faring well in her tasks. She'd managed to keep everyone from injury and deal with their enemies swiftly. She had also managed to find, and rescue, a few survivors. However, her self neglect was beginning to take it's toll.


	4. Into Silence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carth can either kill Revan and gain vengeance, or help her and give forgiveness. It is not an easy war to wage inside one's heart.

They'd come to one of the last few doors remaining, and proceeded as usual. In the battle that followed, however, Revan progressively slowed down. Her defenses began to falter, and her attacks were weak. Carth and Jolee tried to make up for her waining strength, unaware of how much they actually relied on her. So far they only had really been back up, and the difference between their abilities and hers was painfully obvious. 

Finally, after defeating about half their foes, Revan's strength gave out. She stumbled and fell and the selkath immediately swarmed over her. She struggled weakly, but it was to no avail. Carth found it shocking to see her so helpless.

Some how Jolee and Carth managed to kill the remaining selkath. The huge commotion had caught the attention of a larger group of the beasts in the next room. They beat at the door intently, and it wouldn't be long before they broke through. Both Carth and Jolee doubted they would be able to defeat them, but focused on a more immediate situation.

The both of them took in the scene, stunned. Revan lay on her back, eyes closed. Her hands were resting on her stomach and her legs were slightly bent at the knees. She was pale and a cold sweat had broken over her skin. She shook with every breath she took. 

There were three deep scratches on the left side of her face. There were jagged rows of punctures on the right side of her neck, upper right arm, left wrist, right hip, and upper, left calf. More deep scratches were evident on her left collar bone, stomach, the small of her back, and resulted as deep gashes in various places on her legs. Her clothes were ripped and blood poured from her wounds. 

"Oh lass, you're in a bad shape." Jolee exclaimed.

He and Carth moved over to her. Hearing their approach, Revan stirred and attempted to push herself to her feet. Jolee stopped her.

"Easy lass, trying to be tough isn't going to help anyone. You just rest while I fix you up."

She let herself go limp and closed her eyes again. Jolee wasted no time. He examined her from head to toe, checking every scratch, every puncture. Then he emptied his medical supplies from his bag.

"Carth," he ordered "I'm going to need your help."

Carth frowned, but crouched down closer to Revan's left side.

"Follow my directions to the letter, understand lad?"

Jolee's eyes were locked on Carth's, and the younger man gave a slight, displeased nod.

"Make a tourniquet above her left elbow."

Carth did as he was told by ripping some cloth from Revan's garments, then wrapping and cinching it tightly around the place that had been specified. He couldn't believe what he was doing. Again he was confused. Revan was practically dying in front of him, and he didn't know if he should help her, or allow her to die. She owed a debt she could only repay in death. However, to allow her to die was extending her a kindness she didn't deserve. 

"Now, listen carefully," Jolee continued as he worked on stopping the blood flow from the gashes in her legs "She's fatigued, dehydrated, and downright exhausted. The bites on her wrist, hip, and upper arm are contaminated. To add to that, she's losing a lot of blood. All we have to worry about is the bleeding and the contamination in her wrist. Her jedi training will protect her from the toxins in her other wounds. But her wrist is a different story. 

When she was bitten, some of the selkath's saliva was introduced into her artery. Her blood was able to clot the small punctures there, which trapped the toxin in her bloodstream. At this rate, the toxins will reach her heart before her training can kick in.

I'm going to need you to find some sort of small blade, reopen the wound, and bleed the toxin out. You'll need to be careful. She's already lost a lot of blood, and she's fatigued. If you cut too deep, she could easily bleed to death. On the other hand, if you do not cut deep enough, the toxin will get her.

I'll concentrate on stopping her excess bleeding. Hurry, she won't last long!"

Jolee's orders provided a moderate course of action for Carth. He would accidentally cut a little too deep. If she survived, she could live out the rest of her life in misery. If she died, her debt would be paid.

Carth removed a small vibroblade knife from a sheath inside his boot. He'd never had a chance to use it, but he felt safer when carrying it. He presented it to Jolee, who consented.

"That'll do. Now remember, you only want to niche the artery, then squeeze a little bit of blood from the cut. Make the opening about a half an inch, moving up her arm."

Carth grabbed Revan's wrist and put the blade against her skin. Apprehension flooded through him at the thought that he might get complete revenge. Yet, there was something else that ran through his blood. He trembled slightly.

Why! Why do I feel this way?

He tightened his grip on Revan's wrist and felt her jolt from the immense pressure. Instantly he felt a twinge of regret.

What do I care if she suffers?

Feeling sick, but still determined and malevolent, he prepared to slice into her. As he took in a deep breath, he realized Revan was watching him. He turned to look at her and was taken aback. Instead of looking away, she held his gaze. 

Her eyes were no longer empty. They were overflowing with pain and terror. The same terror Carth had seen in them back on Taris; in the abandoned apartment. Those sapphire eyes hit him hard. There was something else as well. Hidden in those eyes was also anticipation for the pain he would bring her. She was silently prompting him to carry out his plan.

For a moment, she even wished he would move that blade to her throat. The temptation had crossed his mind. Yet he'd kept it to her wrist.

He broke eye contact with her and returned his attention to the knife in his hand, but her eyes never fell from him. His heart beat powerfully in his chest with excitement, but his arms felt weak. He had to kill his feelings for her somehow. Revan had to die. He couldn't let his pathetic infatuation keep him from getting justice.

Justice...Was he really getting justice? She hadn't attacked Telos herself.

Carth wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. He wanted the both of them to live and die. He couldn't understand why he was so at war with himself. He did know that one side was going to claim victory right there and then, and he was hoping it would be the side that would avenge him. The world twisted and spun.

Do it!...Do it!...Just do it!

He forced himself to cut into Revan's soft cold skin; and in that instant, one side cried triumph over the other. Only, it hadn't been the side he'd hoped for. Strangely, it had been the side he'd wanted. Why had he wanted it to win?

He dropped his blade, but continued to hold onto Revan. His tight grip squeezing out the necessary amount of blood without him realizing it. He could feel Revan writhing beneath his grasp. He felt horrible. Like he was being turned inside out.

"You cut too deep, lad!" Jolee shouted.

However, Carth couldn't really hear him. He was frozen, with the world around him still spinning.

He had wanted this side to win because, he didn't want to be alone anymore. He'd wanted it because, she'd given him a reason to live past revenge. Also, he didn't want to be a monster. If the other side had won, he would have no longer been human. 

He realized it went deeper than even that. She was innocent of his wife's death. Morganna had said so herself, and he knew she hadn't lied. Revan had even reunited him with his son. His heart beat painfully. There wasn't really any reason why he shouldn't try to forgive Revan. He had been the one who was wrong. 

Carth snapped out of it when Jolee pushed him aside. Heart still throbbing, he watched as the elderly man wrapped some cloth around Revan's wrist and applied pressure. That was when he realized that Revan had ceased moving. After a moment Jolee let her hand drop and gently grabbed her face in his hands.

"Revan! Revan, open your eyes and look at me!...Revan!"

Carth felt as though he might die. No, he felt worse. He felt the same as he had when his wife died, but different. The desired side may have won, but the opposing side hadn't been brought down without a final blow.


	5. Warmth Of A Sun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An onslaught is coming.

"Revan, please! Wake up! Respond! Revan..."

Jolee sagged, he was sweaty and trembling. He continued to hover over her, stroking her cheeks and mumbling pleas. Revan didn't respond, she only lay still. Jolee sighed and ceased to plead. A tear fell on Revan's cheek.

"You're hands are warm..." she coughed weakly, her eyes fluttering open "Like a sun."

Both Carth and Jolee were overflowing with relief. Still, Carth felt as though he could die.

"Just take it easy. I'll get you some water. You'll be better in no time..." Jolee rambled. 

It was at that moment that both men remembered the group of selkath beating at the door. It wouldn't be more than a matter of minutes before they broke through. Both Carth and Jolee knew that Revan would not be strong enough to fight, and that they stood little chance against the beasts. Still, they had to try.

Revan's eyes began to close, but Jolee shook her gently and her eyes fluttered open again.

"No, lass. Try to stay awake, stay with me. I'll go get you that water, but I want you to talk to me while I go fetch it, understand?"

"Yes." She croaked.

"Tell me why you like suns."

"Their light...It holds so much energy, so much life. I miss sunlight..." She finished in a whisper.

Jolee was back by her side by that time, with a canteen and a small container. He removed the cap to the canteen, then opened the container. He poured the container's contents, a fine grey powder, into the canteen, recapped the canteen, and shook it up.

"Carth," Jolee commanded warily "Help her sit up..."

Jolee had seen what had just taken place with Revan's wrist. He knew Carth had purposely cut too deep, and that he'd been warring with himself. He also knew that one side had claimed victory, but he didn't know which side that had been. Regardless of whether or not the better side had won, Jolee still did not trust Carth with Revan's sake.

Carth hesitantly did as he was told, allowing Revan to lay back and rest against him. His eyes never leaving Carth, Jolee brought the canteen to Revan's lips and steadily poured the water, little by little, into her mouth. She swallowed it down, nearly choking twice, but managed to drink it all.

Carth felt extremely uncomfortable having Revan so close to him. By all rights, he shouldn't even be allowed to touch her. He wanted to apologise, to be forgiven. He didn't know if that were possible, though. Part of his anger still lingered. He supposed it would be some time before he would be able to accept the truth, the reality.

When Revan had drained the canteen, Carth was allowed to let her lie back down. Jolee checked her wounds again, pleased to find that most of the bleeding had stopped. He anointed, and dressed each injury properly, taking care of her wrist last. 

When he was sure the blood flow had ceased, he removed the cloth tourniquet. Then he bandaged the injury like he had the others, tying the cloth as a brace over top. When he'd accomplished all that, he repacked his remaining supplies and turned to Carth.

"Those selkath will break through that door very soon now. It'd be best if we were prepared for them."

"What do you have in mind?" Carth muttered. 

"Well, first let's move Revan as far from the door as possible." Jolee suggested in a guarded tone.

Carth nodded, avoiding the elderly man's eyes. He was vaguely aware that Jolee had seen what he'd done, and so did not trust him. He felt ashamed of the trouble he'd caused and at his ignorance and foolishness. At this point, he was so disoriented that he couldn't do anything other than follow orders. Whatever Jolee asked of him now, he would do without defiance.

Without a word, Carth walked to Revan's side, bent down, and scooped her up. She was unconscious and so offered no complaint for the pain the transaction caused her body. Jolee was surprised, but showed nothing. Instead, he watched intently as the younger man heaved her up into his arms. He would tolerate no mistreatment of that poor woman.

He had originally intended for both he and Carth to move her. Jolee, himself, would've lifted her torso, while the lad would've gotten her feet. That way he would've been able to ensure that she wouldn't get accidentally dropped. However, Carth had been so quick to act on request, Jolee hadn't had time to object. 

Jolee's concern was unfounded. Carth set her down gently in the corner farthest from the breaking door. Not once had she slipped in his hands. Not in the slightest. She whimpered in protest as she was being set down, but her eyes did not open.

After Revan had been carefully placed, Carth returned to Jolee's side. He waited patiently for his next orders, still avoiding eye contact with the aged jedi. Jolee raised an eyebrow at him, but made no comment or inquiry about his behavior.

"Now," Jolee stated sternly "We should set up barriers that will slow our foes when they break through. We have a few mines that we can place around the door, and we can create a small wall between us and them using plasteel containers and foot lockers. It won't stop them, but they'll be stumbling over each other and the wall as they come at us, thus giving us more time to react. 

My plan is simple. We set the mines in a calculated cluster before the door. Then we build our wall. We'll stand some distance away from our barriers. The first handful that breaks through the door should be taken out by the mines. Those behind the first will charge in only to trip over bodies and a wall. You'll nail as many of them as you can with your blastor while they're delayed. I'll take care of those who happen to make it past our trap."

It had crossed his mind that they should retreat to previous chambers and lock the doors behind them until Revan recovered enough to continue. (It might have crossed Carth's mind as well, if he hadn't been so disoriented.) However, Revan was too weak to travel. If they moved her farther than the hall outside the chamber they currently occupied, her wounds would reopen and she would bleed to death before he had time to react. She had lost too much blood already. 

Also, the door they'd come through was considerably weaker than the one the selkath were beating at. If they were to retreat to the hall, they'd only be prolonging the inevitable for a few more minutes. To add to that, they'd have less space to use in their defense. Their best chance lay with setting up the barriers and standing their ground.

Carth did not think to question the capability of Jolee's plan. He simply nodded and waited for further instruction. Jolee was much wiser than he, and Carth could hardly think at all, let alone come up with a better plan.

Carth placed and set the mines where Jolee told him, since he had more skill in the task. Then both men lifted the containers and foot lockers and built the wall behind the mine field. They worked quickly, aware that the selkath would break through any moment. With beads of sweat on their brows, they finished and stepped back, weapons at the ready.

They'd completed their trap just in time. The door had opened a crack. Little by little, but swiftly none the less, that crack widened until the door was completely open. Just as according to plan, the first handful fell victim to the mines. The others that followed stumbled as they approached. 

Carth began to fire upon them as they struggled to make it past the wall. It was going well, not a single enemy was managing to get through. Things changed suddenly, however, when a selkath managed to knock a plasteel container away. Some of the beasts broke through and approached at a mad dash.

Jolee raised his blades, but the advancing foes stopped short with a jerk and dropped to the floor. Sprawled on what passed as their hands and knees, they began to lick Revan's spilt and drying blood off the floor. It was a disgusting sight to see, and Jolee slew them while they were distracted.

More continued to pour through the gap, widening it until the wall was useless. The only thing that prevented the remaining selkath from overpowering the two men, was that sickening pool of blood. Every foe that made it through always dropped to lick it up. Jolee would then slay them like he'd done the others.

Eventually, however, the floor was licked clean; and the selkath advanced, unhindered, towards the men. The beasts hunted after the flesh and blood of the jedi and the pilot, but there was something else behind their attacks. They wanted Revan, more than the other two.

They could smell the fresh wounds on her. They sensed she was weak. They could tell that the spilt blood was hers and had acquired a taste for it. With powerful lust, they pressed forward.

The two men fought on, side by side, to the best of their abilities. Carth shot down what foes he could, and Jolee attempted to withhold the rest. The enemy was too great, however. Slowly, but surely, they lost their ground until they were nearly standing on top of Revan. It wasn't long after, that the selkath managed to force Jolee to his kness, and Carth soon followed.

The battle was over. It had been a good fight but, the beasts were just too many. Now they had both men pinned down tight. The two of them struggled with all their might to break free. It was no use. One of the crazed selkath leaped forward to land a killing blow on Carth. They would kill the men, ravage the woman of which they hungered so greatly for, then devour the other two.

Carth met the eyes of his attacker defiantly, prepared for the impact. He was taken completely off-guard when he was suddenly jerked from his kneeling position to the floor. This sudden motion wrenched him free of his captors, and caused the attacking selkath to smash into the wall.


	6. In Spite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The injured will inevitably rise up again.

Before either side knew what was happening, a blurred figure freed Jolee with swift strikes from closed fists and blasted all the selkath back with a powerful torrent of the force. All the beasts and the two men looked from where they lay to the figure. It was Revan who stood dauntingly between her comrades and their foes.

Her stance was straight, elegant. Her hands were fanned at her sides as thought they were ready to unleash another force attack at any moment. If she was in pain, she did not show it. Her face and pose were calm and serene. An electrifying power radiated from her presence.

The enemy wasted no time getting back on their feet. Yet, they paused momentarily before assaulting her. They were, no doubt, trying to asses how big of a threat she posed. The pause was brief. It wasn't long before they rushed at her.

Revan raised her arms into an x in front of her chest. All but her first and middle fingers on both hands closed into her palms. She stepped forward to meet her attackers as they came, unwavering, at full speed. She was unafraid. 

The first foe to come against her aimed to tackle her to the floor. Bent low to catch her by the middle as he dashed forward, he was nearly there. Revan swung her arms wide apart in a sweeping, circular motion before her, dealing a painful blow to his face. It knocked him backwards, and he staggered and fell.

The brute who followed up behind the first attacker, tried to shove her off balance. Keeping her arms stiff and straight with palms up, she drew her hands together; slamming the sides of her fists into both sides of his face. He to stumbled backward.

A third beast ran past his stumbling party member, aiming to grab Revan's throat. She readied herself, her hands raised at chest level with her her fingers still pointed. When her foe drew close, she used her pointed fingers to press several nerves on his body. Her blows came so fast, her hands were a blur. Pressing certain nerves, she temporarily disabled him.

Revan continued to deliver similar blows to all of the opposition. She was incredible in her strange form of combat. Dodging, kicking, thrusting, and countering in fast, fluid movements, despite her injuries. Still, it wasn't enough to stop the enemy. They would simply get back on their feet and come at her again. Carth and Jolee couldn't give her aid because, her movements were so fast and broad, the risk of hitting her instead of the selkath was too great.

Even so, the battle was not over. Revan had pushed her enemy back until they were against the barrier wall of storage bins and footlockers. As she ducked beneath an attack, she swooped down and retrieved Carth's dropped vibro knife. She began using that blade in sync with her assaults.

She was able to kill three foes with it by cutting their throats, and wound four others. However, the beasts were many and they were so full of lust for her flesh, they kept coming. Even with deep gouges in them from her borrowed knife. Drenched in selkath blood and breathing hard, Revan fell back.

She stood near a wall, waiting. As expected her enemy came forward. This time they came at a cautious walk. Revan flung the knife away without looking. It flew from her hand at incredible speed and landed at carth's feet flawlessly. She stood unmoving for a few seconds afterward, the selkath drawing ever nearer. 

When they reached about half way, Revan thrust her hand through a power conduit box and seized a handful of wires. Blue ribbons of electricity flashed up her arm and into her shoulder. The enemy froze, watching the scene unfold. The lighting in the room flickered on and off, completely shutting down after a moment.

After she released the wires, the back up generator kicked into gear and dim lights flashed on, giving just enough illumination to allow the two men to see what took place next. Revan stood erect and fearless before the opposition. The beasts stood grouped and uncertain. In spite of their fear, their hunger for her was just too great. 

They advanced at full speed. Shimmers of blue flashed over Revan's skin. She raised her hand, crouched down, and slammed her palm onto the floor in one graceful movement. The enemy jerked to a halt and quaked as blue streamers danced around them and their fatal prey. 

Moments passed before Revan eased the flow of electricity. The blue threads vanished and the selkath fell dead before the trio. Jolee and Carth stared, speechless, as she rose to her feet. Although injured, she had just defended the both of them with her life and claimed victory. Carth wondered what she was made of. It had to be something indestructible. She stood swaying a moment, then fell to her knees, coughing up blood. Jolee flew to her side.


	7. Missing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was left unfinished....

"Just take it easy," he ordered "Don't make any sudden moves."

She groaned and slipped further down onto the floor. Jolee reached over and grasped her shoulder. Trembling, she placed a hand over his. A violent shiver ran through her and all of Jolee's cuts and bruises faded away. His concerned expression intensified.

She began to choke again, her body writhing as she struggled for breath. Carth moved beside her and crouched down, leaving his blood stained knife where it lay. He would never pick it up. He was taken by surprise when she suddenly grabbed his arm. Gasping, she gave it a squeeze and Carth could feel a tingling sensation travel from his arm to the rest of his body. His cuts faded like Jolee's had. 

"Revan please! Don't push yourself any further!" 

Jolee was more than desperate, but it was already too late. Revan collapsed over her knees, choking and struggling wildly. She cried out in terror and pain between gasps. Jolee tried to hold her down and still so that she would not cause herself more harm, and so that he could administer medical attention, but couldn't manage it.

Without thinking Carth reached out and wrapped her in his arms. He held her tightly against him, keeping her from hurting herself further. Her legs kicked out in agonized writhing, but Carth's grip didn't loosen. Jolee took advantage of the moment and injected an anesthetic, using a vial and syringe from his bag, into her neck.

Moments later it began to take effect. Her struggles weakened and her breath slowed and became even. Carth still held her as she continued to cry out in anguish. Slowly, her struggling ceased altogether and her cries died down to whimpers. Carth loosened his grip but kept her close. With a final protest in the form of a sigh, she lost complete consciousness. A tear fell from Carth's eyes. He felt as though his wife had died all over again.

Carth and Jolee awakened hours later to find that Revan was gone....


End file.
